~MARCH is TRISOMY AWARENESS MONTH~

~The month of March is significant to me for a variety of reasons.

It is the month that my father and brother have their birthdays.

It is the month for Brain Injury Awareness,  Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia Awareness, National Nutrition Month, and Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month.

The most significant of all is that March 29th, 2007 was the day that my youngest son Bennett-Chadlen Roy was born at Mt. Sinai Hospital in Toronto, Canada, and spent his entire 8 day life at Sick Kids Hospital NICU.

Bennett-Chadlen was diagnosed with Trisomy 13 halfway through my pregnancy, in my fifth month.  I had no idea what it was, and what it meant for his life.  I just knew that it had to be something bad judging by the look of horror and  pain on my midwife's face as she tried to break it to me as gently as possible.

How do you tell someone that their unborn child is affected by a rare chromosomal abnormality which often results in death prenatally or shortly following birth?

March is TRISOMY AWARENESS MONTH.  It is the one month of the year when all families of children born affected with Trisomy can join forces and inform our family and friends what Trisomy is, and what it means to us.

What began is the worst possible nightmare that I could possibly imagine, has turned into an unbelievable journey of unconditional love, pure acceptance, grief, healing, and joy.  Why joy you might ask?

My son gave me the greatest gift imaginable.  He opened me up to the most intense feeling of love that I could never imagine without experiencing it firsthand.  There are no words for the wonder and depth of admiration that I felt for this tiny, unborn son of mine.  Every single moment of time, every tiny little heartbeat......was graciously celebrated within my womb.  I spent each day rubbing him through my belly, speaking his name as I described what I could see and what "we" were doing.  I spent countless hours rocking him in front of the fire at night, in a room lit only by the flames.  I celebrated every kick and prayed for many more.  I shed tears that I thought would never stop.

Through the gift of my blessed boy, I learned to live spontaneously and squeeze every amount of happiness out of each and every day that I can breath.  I welcome life, I rejoice in the ability to experience the rain, wind, snow, and sunshine.  I hug my boys as often as possible, and never allow a day to go by without them knowing how much they are cherished and loved.  The same goes for the special people and friends in my life.

Through the internet I was able to not only learn about the survivors and families affected by Trisomy 13, but I was also able to reach out and 'meet' others in similar situations and seek comfort and solace within their words of support which they so generously gave to me when I enquired or requested it.

As I near my sweet boy's 4th Heavenly Birthday I can't help but feel sentimental and think back to those final days 4 years ago as I was waiting for him to be born.

I can't explain it, but I can show you the beautiful photos which were provided to me courtesy of Heather Renee Morgan of Lifespark Photography.

Love, Peace, & Nimkee-Blessings to all my special Trisomy families today, and always xxoo

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

~What makes a Mother?~

What makes a Mother?

I thought of you and closed my eyes, and prayed to God today.

I asked, “What makes a Mother?” and I know I heard him say:

“A Mother has a baby, this we know is true.”

“But God, can you be a Mother when your baby’s not with you?”

“Yes you can”, He replied with a confidence in His voice,

“I give many women babies, when they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime, and others for a day,

And some I send to feel your womb, but there’s no need to stay.”

“I just don’t understand this God, I want my baby here.”

 He took a breath and cleared His throat, and then I saw a tear.

“I wish I could show you what your child is doing today.  If you could see your child smile with other children and say:”

“We go to Earth and learn our lessons of love and life and fear.   

My Mommy loved me oh so much I got to come straight here.   

I feel so lucky to have a Mom who had so much love for me, 

I learned my lesson very quickly;   

My Mommy set me free.   

I miss my Mommy oh so much, but I visit her each day.

When she goes to sleep, on her pillow’s where I lay.   

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek and whisper in her ear,

‘Mommy don’t be sad today, I’m your baby and I’m here.’”

“So you see my dear sweet one, your children are OK.   

Your babies are here in My home and this is where they’ll stay.

They’ll wait for you with me until your lesson is through,

And on the day that you come home they’ll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother, it’s the feeling in your heart.

It’s the love you had so much of right from the very start.”

~Jennifer Wasik

~Thinking of all my special Mommy friends that are spending their holidays missing their loved ones.  

I send prayers of peace, love, & healing to those that are spending their Christmas in the NICU (neo-natal intensive care unit) with their new babies, in need of some extra tender-loving care.  

May our Creator watch over you, and shower you with an endless abundance of Nimkee-Blessings.  

Peace be with you,

Melissa xxoo

~Reflections of Cystic Fibrosis~

http://www.cysticfibrosis.ca/(click here for more info)

I remember a visit to Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto, Ontario back in 2004.  Tristan (5--diagnosed with Spherocytosis which is a blood disease) was there to have his spleen and gallbladder removal surgery and we had to spend 11 days on the surgical floor as he healed.

I took advantage of having someone to sit with Tristan and I took a brief jaunt to grab a coffee and a snack.  In the nurses/admission area I saw a woman holding a very sick looking little baby.  He was several months old, and had tubes attached to him.  The mother had a very sad glint in her eyes, but smiled at me and said "Hi" as I approached.

My mommy senses kicked in and I just had to take a peak at her baby boy and let her know how cute I thought he was.  I then asked her what was wrong.  She told me he was born with Cystic Fibrosis and his life expectancy was nearing its end.  My heart took a leap and I felt my eyes instantly fill with tears.  I instinctively reached out and placed my hand on her arm and looked at her and told her how sorry I was to hear that as I had also lost a baby to stillbirth and it was a pain that I could relate to.

How does a parent maintain composure as they know their child's life is ending?  At that moment in time I couldn't even conceive of experiencing and surviving such a thing.

She thanked me for listening as she shared her son's all too brief life story and explained that all they could do at that point was provide him with comfort measures and hope for the best.  The only thing which may prolong his life was if another family lost their baby and donated the necessary tiny lungs to another family in need.

I walked away with tears and just felt such an incredibly overwhelming sense of sorrow and heartache for this woman.  Thoughts of her and her baby stayed with me over those next several days, weeks, months, and even years.  Every time I hear the words 'Cystic Fibrosis', this woman and her beautiful son instantly appear in my mind.

Despite the sadness which she was experiencing, she was still able to smile and truly appreciate that I had stopped and allowed her to speak with me.  She said most people just keep on walking and go about their day.  She just needed someone to listen, show compassion and empathy, and provide that little bit of comfort in that moment.

This link gives hope for the future for many families that are struggling to survive with Cystic Fibrosis.  Click here for more personal stories of hopes, dreams, and determination.

As we are in the midst of our holiday season, please remember all those that are spending their holidays in hospitals around the world, watching their loved ones slip away. 

What can you do?  Consider the generous, self-less gift of organ donation to help another family in need.

Life----it's in you to give.

~♥ ♥ TODAY WE REMEMBER UNITED, EVERY DAY WE REMEMBER IN OUR HEARTS ♥ ♥ ~

~October 15th is a monumental day for families like mine, for it's the ONE day all year that we are recognized and given permission to mourn openly and remember our beloved ^Angel^Babies.

This is monumental as much of society still perpetuates the old way of thinking, instilling the Taboo Silence of Infant Loss.  A mother never forgets the day a child is born, regardless of the duration of that pregnancy, or newborn's life.  

All that we ask is that you all try to imagine what we've gone through, and understand with compassion that we are doing our very best to strive and survive through the greatest heartache imaginable.

It is a loss of hopes and dreams of future days spent cuddling as we watch our children learn and grow.  

Be gentle with us, as we are with you, for we also understand that it's so very difficult for you to deal with our grief.

Once a year on this date, families around the world unite and remember their angel-babies in a variety of ways.

http://www.october15th.com/

Many others, like myself, will release balloons in Loving Memory of our Angel Babies.  

In conjunction with Project Sweet Peas, and their balloon release event, I too released balloons to the babies of the families that sent in their requests.  I released balloons for 87 babies on my list; together Project Sweet Peas as a whole released balloons for over 400 little lives lost too soon.

My second angel-baby Bennett-Chadlen was born on March 29, and grew his tiny wings 8 days later on Good Friday, April 6th, 2007 at Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto, Ontario

My first angel, Noah-Alexander, was born with wings on August 6th, 1999

Tristan, Tanner, Mason, & Rheanne were there to help honour the memory of their beloved siblings

My boys and I ready to release the balloons!

Up, up, & away.....*photo courtesy of my boys as I was cutting the ties!

On behalf of Nimkee Blessings, I want to wish all families of ^Angels^ peace and comfort in your hearts, knowing that we all remember with you.  I wish you strength to get through the difficult moments as they inevitably come, and courage to face another day.  Set small goals, and don't fight the feelings.  Get through today.......then do it again tomorrow.  Be gentle with yourself.


~Love, Peace, & Nimkee-Blessings to all~

~ ♥ ♥ Today, we remember united; Every day we remember in our hearts ♥ ♥ ~

~1 candle for Noah-Alexander, 1 candle for Bennett-Chadlen, 1 candle for all~